Those three words seem innocent enough don’t they? It may seem like a nice thing to say to someone when they’re feeling down and depressed but I don’t see it that way. I don’t like it when people tell me to be positive when I’m having a rough time. Or feel depressed. It makes me feel like my emotions don’t matter. It’s belittling.
What I feel matters. What I’m going through matters. It’s hard to always have a positive attitude. Do you think I want to be depressed and negative? It’s not something I enjoy. It’s something that’s super easy for you to say. But it’s a hell of a lot harder for me to act on all the time.
I’d like to see you be positive all the time when you’re shitting blood 10 times a day. When you’re in so much pain all you want to do is scream your lungs out. When another medication has failed. When you have to go in for another colonoscopy. I’d like you to go through that and have a positive outlook and positive attitude all the time for a disease that is incurable.
So, the next time you’re thinking about telling someone with a chronic disease to “Just be positive,” please think twice. It would be kinder to just listen to that person rant and rave about what’s going on. Or tell then you’ll pray for them or ask what you can do to help. Just don’t tell us to “Be positive.”